Sibling With A Cat Pillows

Zen Litter Box

'They used to call me 'Fluffy', but it's been 'Lucky' ever since I survived the spin cycle.'

Cat watching plug sockets.

"Cat-astrophic Trifecta" "I pooped in Mona's Jimmy Choo handbag." "I knocked over grampa's ashes." "I buried a Barbie in the litter box."

'And once more with feeling.'

'Let's say you're all stretched out in your favorite spot and it gets cloudy...'

Dog Hunting Trophies.

Haute Suture

"Maureen Alsop is leaving her magnolia, and her delphinium and her cats with us this weekend."

"There's something about ripping the stuffing out of a toy that turns me into a wild dog. I'm afraid I actually like that feeling."

'Wow...Your work is amazing!'

'Don't be embarrassed by your anti-barking collar, implanted tracking chip, and GPS device. Just think of them as fashion accessories.'

I'm beginning to regret buying that Roomba.

'They're dog roses!'

"No I said fetch , not wretch.."

"It doesn't do anything all day but eat and sleep and get waited on by a staff of bipeds. I think we've found the leader."

"I only scratch up the furniture hoping they'll replace it with something more stylish."

Pet Entertainers

Cat puts off paying gas bill, to sleep longer...

"All you're doing is emboldening cats."

'Now, you're new here, but you should know the rules: I get Master's newspaper and slippers! Got that?'

"Lori, I can’t talk right now — I’m right in the middle of updating my dog’s Facebook page."

"We get fantastic indoor facilities during the cold months."

"Cat park"

'Oh that just means he wants you to rub his tummy.'

"Is listening to her talk about her feelings worth a tiny can of tuna?"

"Look, you got mail! Press the 'fetch' key."

"I'm OK. But I think the dog wants to go out."

Dog Sees Only Food

"I'm beginning to worry she might work out who is really in charge."

When Dogs Rule

'I've finally learned to delegate.'

People with pet dogs in a dog park with workout equipment for dogs.

I can't afford to pay for Fluffy's spay...

'So what if he goes crazy now and then. Cats also have nine minds.'