Sibling Dealing With Legal Issues Gifts

"Your divorce lawyer has impeccable credentials Mitzi, but have you met mine? Presenting...Giganticus!"

At the Museum

'Peter the Flying Hippo is my favorite storybook character without any merchandising tie-ins.'

'I didn't do my homework because I forgot my user name and password.'

Likes: $2.

A Punk Rocker Cocoon.

"There's something about ripping the stuffing out of a toy that turns me into a wild dog. I'm afraid I actually like that feeling."

"I have a recurring nightmare that I've taken a test, and the professor won't give me an 'A'."

Boy and Bear and Monster

"I wanted to be a baseball player 'til I found out they send you to the showers."

'Don't be embarrassed by your anti-barking collar, implanted tracking chip, and GPS device. Just think of them as fashion accessories.'

"Isn't it an amazing co-incidence that this is an orange, and it IS ORANGE?"

Toy plane with pilot eject.

"I sincerely hope you learned a lesson this time, Mark. Drawing cartoons on your homework will get you nowhere in life."

'Nope. I didn't see any dogfish.'

I'm beginning to regret buying that Roomba.

'Not just my homework - The dog chewed up my whole LAPTOP!'

'Off hand I'd say she needs re-stuffing.'

"It's not my fault! The Russians must have hacked my brain!"

"You're never a superhero in your own backyard."

'Rock.' - 'Paper.' - 'Boris.'

'They're dog roses!'

"First snowman?"

"You can build it with me, but you can't wreck it with me."

"Arithmetic gets a lot harder when you run out of fingers and toes."

"It's an Eyesaur."

What do you want, the moon on a stick?

"He'll never grow out of it. It's made of rubber."

'Larry liked to crack the window before bed.'

"I don't care if you saw this in a western..."

"Lori, I can’t talk right now — I’m right in the middle of updating my dog’s Facebook page."

"I really love school. There's only one problem. I think not having a college degree is holding me back."

"All you're doing is emboldening cats."

'I've been told before that I'm very mature for a three year old.'