Showbiz Farmers Gifts

Cow Show Tunes

A sure sign of rain

"Here we go again. Look at me everybody....I'm a cloud."

"My smelly French cheese is much better than your Canadian beef."

COWS: Cow Pong

Alas poor Daisy, I knew her well!

'You knew all the time that we were inseparable.'

"You're living in a fantasy world, Nelly. Farmer Dave doesn't know you're alive. Plus, he's a human being, he's married, he's the church pastor and he's secretly gay."

'How are you at thinking outside the flocks?'

"There's got to be a better way to raise potatoes!"

Cheesie Rider

Bonita shows up late for the girls' Thursday night 'Jam Session'.

'The guy in the scarecrow shop promised me that nothing scares crows better than the 'Giant Fox XR50'.'

Fresh off the Farm.

'I'm about to die and now I realise I have REALLY BAD breath!'

'Hey Sally, do these new capris make me look pretentious?'

Objects in mirror bear no relation to reality.

'It's definitely not broken... but you may have pulled a hammy!'

'Yes, I did tell you to hang the fire extinguisher where it would be easy to reach, but...'

A Tongue Stud.

'Take a picture...it'll last longer.'

A-Hem! I'm still singing here!

'Nonsense! They can't All have headaches.'

The Mongolian Steps Slinky Cows.

'Wanna look for corn on the internet?'

'Well Alice. Now do you know what cull means?'

"Come off it, you're not working from dawn till dusk: You're working at dawn and at dusk..."

'This is your third speeding ticket in a week. Sure your horse didn't get into some genetically modified hay?'

'My practice is limited to small animals, Sir....'

'I overheard the farmer say I have a future at McDonalds.'

'Well, no, I wouldn't say I'm a mad cow, although Farmer Brown does get on my nerves once in a while!'

"I am very comfortable with my bovinity."

'Bad news is Tim Turkey is dead, the good news is I've made a wish!'

Tropical Cow Tank

A centi-stampede.