Shop Till You Drop Fan Gifts

Horatio Sparkins

'We're conducting a shopper-flow study for the new giant Oakdale mall.'

'Excuse me. I must take this call... it's from one aisle over.'

"T-shirt weather's coming. How ready are you?"

"Wait a sec, I have a coupon around here somewhere."

Next year, we are NOT going to Costco.

A young couple selects items from a shop.

I love Museum Shops

'The service is so much better when you dress as royalty.'

Orderly Conduct of Sales

Where there's a Mall--There's a Way.

'Let me through - I've a bargain for a nose!'

"I'm innocent. I've just never been able to pass up a good plea bargain."

He only had enough money for one, and for the life of him he couldn't remember the difference,

It would be hours before Jack realized that his wife was not being kinky but had, in fact, gone shopping.

Buy 1 Get 1 Free. Buy 2 You're Stupid.

'Excuse me, but is there any chance of finding me a decaffeinated clerk?'

'I hear voices again! Buy! Buy! Buy!'

Hole Sale

'Brilliant idea, Simkins, the old price was actually higher than the present one!'

'It's pouring down rain. . . why don't we go school shopping. . . It would save your mom some trouble if I took you.'

'You've been on eBay again haven't you?'

Shopping Trolley

'Everything must go...manners included!'

'Credit card customer of the month'

'I just got my second wind! How about another $500?'

"Well, I'm not sure what it is, but it was 50% off in the sale so I thought I'd get one before they sold out!"

Christmas Special Shopping Trolley.

"And if you sign up for our Gold Star membership level we stop pestering you to sign up."

'How you gonna keep em down on the farm once they've seen the new mall in town?'

Oranges

It was love at first sight.

'This could be a new record!'

"I heard there might be layoffs."

'Never misplace a remote control again with this RemoteT-shirt, velcro combo!'