Shop Till You Drop Fan Pillows

Horatio Sparkins

'We're conducting a shopper-flow study for the new giant Oakdale mall.'

'Excuse me. I must take this call... it's from one aisle over.'

"T-shirt weather's coming. How ready are you?"

"Wait a sec, I have a coupon around here somewhere."

I love Museum Shops

A young couple selects items from a shop.

Orderly Conduct of Sales

'The service is so much better when you dress as royalty.'

Where there's a Mall--There's a Way.

'Let me through - I've a bargain for a nose!'

"I'm innocent. I've just never been able to pass up a good plea bargain."

He only had enough money for one, and for the life of him he couldn't remember the difference,

It would be hours before Jack realized that his wife was not being kinky but had, in fact, gone shopping.

Buy 1 Get 1 Free. Buy 2 You're Stupid.

Hole Sale

'Excuse me, but is there any chance of finding me a decaffeinated clerk?'

'I hear voices again! Buy! Buy! Buy!'

'It's pouring down rain. . . why don't we go school shopping. . . It would save your mom some trouble if I took you.'

'Brilliant idea, Simkins, the old price was actually higher than the present one!'

'Everything must go...manners included!'

Shopping Trolley

'I just got my second wind! How about another $500?'

'Credit card customer of the month'

"Well, I'm not sure what it is, but it was 50% off in the sale so I thought I'd get one before they sold out!"

Christmas Special Shopping Trolley.

"And if you sign up for our Gold Star membership level we stop pestering you to sign up."

'How you gonna keep em down on the farm once they've seen the new mall in town?'

It was love at first sight.

Oranges

"Time to reboot our winter wardrobe?"

'This could be a new record!'

"I heard there might be layoffs."

"I signed up for a shopaholic class. It was a real bargain."

'Never misplace a remote control again with this RemoteT-shirt, velcro combo!'