Shop Till You Drop Expert Gifts

'Everything must go...manners included!'

"T-shirt weather's coming. How ready are you?"

"Milk, butter, bread - all past the expiration date. either he just hadn't noticed before, or his time machine worked."

"If the economy's ground to a halt, we can help by carrying on shopping."

A young couple selects items from a shop.

Orderly Conduct of Sales

Where there's a Mall--There's a Way.

'Let me through - I've a bargain for a nose!'

'It's the same EVERY year... 5 minutes to midnight; victims are all male, and they're carrying large sums of money.'

"I'm innocent. I've just never been able to pass up a good plea bargain."

'When it comes to shopping, not only does the buck stop here, but so do the fives, tens, twenties, fifties and hundreds.'

'I lost the grocery list you gave me. So I brought home a few weeks supply of pizza.'

Buy 1 Get 1 Free. Buy 2 You're Stupid.

'I hear voices again! Buy! Buy! Buy!'

'Excuse me, but is there any chance of finding me a decaffeinated clerk?'

'Brilliant idea, Simkins, the old price was actually higher than the present one!'

I'll have that first pair you showed me. Sorry, they were sold an hour ago!

'They say gemstones have properties for relieving stress. . . once you get past the stress of paying for them.'

'It's pouring down rain. . . why don't we go school shopping. . . It would save your mom some trouble if I took you.'

"I'll have all that, and this."

Shopping Trolley

Womens dressing rooms.

'Credit card customer of the month'

'Oh, Goddess of Fashion, speak to me!'

"The most moral consumer - Didn't shop at Walmart - Didn't order things on Amazon unless it was, like, an emergency - Tried to be vegan - Always had an extra canvas bag in her car (which was a hybrid, by the way)"

'We're conducting a shopper-flow study for the new giant Oakdale mall.'

'I just got my second wind! How about another $500?'

"Well, I'm not sure what it is, but it was 50% off in the sale so I thought I'd get one before they sold out!"

Christmas Special Shopping Trolley.

"And if you sign up for our Gold Star membership level we stop pestering you to sign up."

"Time to reboot our winter wardrobe?"

'How you gonna keep em down on the farm once they've seen the new mall in town?'

"That'll be another one in the dog house when he gets home!"

"I heard there might be layoffs."

"I signed up for a shopaholic class. It was a real bargain."