Ship History Gifts

If only they'd taken it with them!

When laundry ruled the waves.

On the brink.

Old sea captains queue to see Monster Whale Revenge.

'Well, it wasn't my lucky day... first there was that shark and then I bimped into a bunch of beaver!'

"What if we're just a ship in somebody's bottle? Yar, here comes me existential crisis."

'Look Reg, a ship...we're saved!'

Lost around a military base.

"Shall I let them breathe."

Titanic: How's my steering.

"Actually, I used them as collateral for a loan."

Captain looks out of a porthole and notices that the ship is sinking.

"The Captain really, really hates losing at shuffleboard."

'Hardy I see no chips!'

'But you're an admiral. How can you feel seasick on a waterbed?'

"This crew gets 15 miles to the pound of gruel. They're very fuel efficient."

'How long have you operated multi-engines, sailor?'

'So, what do you want to talk about?'

"How can you feel queasy, we're barely out of port."

"How long have you felt like a three-masted schooner?"

Rats deserting a sinking ship

On the plus side, I'd wager a lot of you folks back there had never seen an iceburg up close before.

Commonly confused homonyms: Frigate and Frigate

"Destroyers"

"Someone switched off the freezer...it's melted."

'Silent type, eh?'

"You can let that go till later, Harris."

On board the MS Hepatology

Jolly Sailor - Warning: May contain old salts.

"...But if you'd led back a heart instead of that spade..."

"....After ten o'clock is quiet time on board for the comfort of our passengers."

F&E Submarine Contractors. When we ask the government for assistance, we should avoid calling it a "bailout."

"Long Johns Silver."

Battleship Bingo Night.

"Looks like a storm ahead, Captain." "I think you're being over dramatic."