Serial Saver Pillows

'Transfer every penny from my joint account to a safe deposit box until Thursday when the sales finish!'

So I'm "cheap." It's a perfectly good word. And it aptly describes my interest in conserving resources. I suppose we could call you "thrifty." Heavens no! And waste two whole letters? I see we've only wasted one whole tea bag.

"So much for password protected."

His temperature appears to rise and fall with the FT index

I wish you kids would get off your electronics and learn a practical skill. Work with your hands! What does he think we're doing?!! Tap tap tap tap tap tap tap tap.

'I got a big refund on my income tax.'

Don't touch that dial! — We're experts, and we know what you should be watching!

Yes, dear, I remembered the coupons and saved a few dollars. The Adventures of Marriedman.

Murphy's Bed meets Murphy's Law.

'For sheer elegance you can't beat the black hole entropy formula.'

"No you are not ok! Tell me what's wrong! You've been sitting for two minutes without checking your phone!"

'Who ordered 10,000 copies of how to conserve paper?'

Murphy bed...Murphy.

'I hope you kept the receipt.'

Cash Rebate

Don't Let Your Computer Eat You Up!

'Wow, thanks for putting it into context. My 42-inch plasma really is obsolete.'

'The problem isn't your high definition television, it's your low definition eyes.'

'You realize, of course, there's nothing wrong with me. . . I'm only here 'cause of your 50%-off-first-visit coupon and I am not a serial bargain shopaholic.'

Save money on the web.

"It's about time the price of generic drugs went down! Oh, and give me fifty quick picks."

Computer camp's not exactly what I expected.

"I'd look up from my phone for you!"

'It's really not that effective, but it's easy to store.'

'Scanning articles without finishing them on the Internet is affecting you. You're not finishing anything.'

Screen Addict

"Mrs. Beetle, Marty's screen is frozen, again."

"The printer ran out of ink so that's only a partial list of the side effects."

"Your daughter has 'I have something to share' syndrome."

'Another dead squirrel, Lieutenant! What kind of Madman are we dealing with?'

"Worst case of stockholm syndrome I've ever seen."

Gentleman wanting to know exactly how much he owes his butler

'Removing the phone is easy. Getting your head and arms to their original positions will take weeks of physical therapy.'

'hello dear, I just got my new office and i think they're trying to tell me something.'

'A decade ago, who could have envisioned beds on the wall?'