Serendipitous Dater Pillows

'This isn't Lindsey, but I AM free for dinner saturday night.'

"...and someone with no fleas. Anything else?"

On my list of outdoor pursuits I put skinny dipping way ahead of this.

"She's in a conversationally induced coma."

'Of course I'm on the pull - I'm a cricketer.'

Sexual chemistry set

'Next, time, we'll meet at my place.'

"And I never kiss in the first two seconds."

"To think—this meeting, which turned into the perfect day, filled with spontaneous adventures that will become priceless memories, could have been an e-mail."

"The last time I was in Europe was 4 boyfriends ago..."

Waterfall of Disappointment

"She says you sound like 'fun'!"

"Sorry, had to barf real quick... so where were we?"

Single men in Tahiti

"I'm not very good at sex, but what do you say to eight hours uproarious sleep?"

"We couldn't connect. He kept spouting technobabble, and I, of course, kept coming back with psychobabble."

"Wanna do lunch?"

'Fancy a good time - no strings attached?'

'Romance-minded clown in hot pursuit of woman'

Spud dating.

"I like anything but long walks on the beach."

Impulse dating. A really bad idea.

'I didn't know people still played footsie.'

"I need a man who will commit."

Here's one for you... she likes long lurches in the moonlight, scared of fire... enjoys terrorizing villages...

Sinlge-white-male seeking single-female who enjoys, silence, long long walks, and scorpions.

'But how can we be sure the dating service didn't make a mistake?'

'Single Heating and Cooling technician in search of intelligent, attractive woman. Send picture of your furnace & AC.'

I'm thinking that for our first date, we should go to the "please touch" museum

'Don't be too sad. Sure, she was special, but there are plenty more fish in the sea.'

'You must be Olivia.'

"I always pick Mr. Wrong..."

"So tell me again where you're from."

"She stood me up. I hosed off my Crocs for nothing."

Tunnel of like