Sentimental Investor Pillows

I'll be gone soon, but I've thought of you all in my will... I wonder if it'll be enough to get the loft done?

'Now that I have your attention...'

"These projections don't make sparkles shoot out my ass."

Profit

Businessmen trying to prop up a line-chart with sticks

'Quick! We need a bigger chart in here!'

'If he knows so much about stocks and shares, how come he still has to work?'

'Looks like your cash cow just got diverted to the slaughterhouse.'

'Oh, Arthur...You sweet, blind, mad, dear, silly fool....Don't you see it could never last?'

"I'm from brokers without borders. Invest in deserted island reits!"

'Investment charts can be complicated, son, but that usually means, 'bonuses'.'

"Fantastic presentation! All of the investors loved it."

'Wavering between being bullish or bearish'

"Okay, money doesn't make you happy. So how about commodity futures?"

'My husband is very sensitive. He cries when he sees sunsets, old romantic films, and falling values of his 401(k)'

Wall Street Couch

'I met him on a Monday and my heart stood still (would you believe?)')

'If only I'd spent as much time on my investment portfolio as I did on my lolly mix when I was a kid.'

Investments - Founders Bear and Bull.

Day trading.

'When investment bankers give parental advice'

"I've finally found a therapist who understands options."

"Ed and Helen's portfolio rose 3 point today on Dave's purchase of 100 shares..."

'Stocks were up on news that no performance enhancing drugs were used to achieve today's highs. . .'

"We're counting on you to reverse this trend before this afternoon's investors meeting."

I was trying to day trade my way through business school, but then the stock market tanked.

'Not feeling well? Don't be silly - your EKG has outperformed the Dow.'

'No thanks, I don't drink when I'm driving home a point about investing.'

US dollar perched on fragile house of cards.

"My path to success and fortune was that rather than foraging and storing my own food, I built a portfolio of storage properties to rent..."

'Stocks rose on the rumor that the market is mostly rumor-driven.'

"And so another trip comes to an end...with family brought closer together by a shared experience."

"When I was a puppy, I barked as a puppy, I understood as a puppy, I thought as a puppy. But when I became a dog, I put away puppy things except for my shabby, old, beat-up stuffy toy. I still freaking love this thing."

Men on escalators reading newspapers, shares are going up on the up escalator and down on the down escalator.

wealth investment