Semantic Spelunker Gifts

"Audacity, noun. Unrestrained impudence. Impudence... Impudence... Impudent, adjective. Marked by impertinent disrespect. Impertinent... Impertinent..."

'I always thought that was just a figure of speech.'

'Needs salt!'

New York Netherworld

Wordplay: Nonstarter.

'How do you stop a fish from smelling?'

"Why 'Black Death'? Why not 'rodent-related'?"

"Gesundheit!"

'The hippiest dryads were often farouche.'

"I see the man who invented autocorrect has died."

'Yes, a winky face is correct... But in ancient times, the semicolon was actually used to separate archaic written devices known as 'complete sentences.''

A 93% pure nugget of lunacy in its natural state.

Thesaurus Editor, Overseer, Corrector, Improver, Modifier.

"Why won’t you just admit you forgot where you parked the car?"

A writer types onto a long sheet of paper.

"I told you we were going down too deep!"

'Step one inexploring a newly discovered cave- wade thru the bat guano.'

'Tighten the drag, Billy! Don't lose him! He's a keeper!'

'Squid? They told me this was CALAMARI!'

'From now on, Jaded will not mean tired or worn out but rather overweight and minging'. V annoying

'I know I am an inverted comma, but I still hate being quoted.'

A Cave Painting

"We're working on it - but first we have to know what to call it!"

'Nothing is what it seems down here. Most people are nudist speleologists, but I lobby for the pharmaceutical industry.'

"This is what the city pays us for, DiAngelo!"

"I hope that the next time you dive into a good book, you first check to see how deep it is!"

Cave explorer discovers writing on the cave wall that says 'explore and discover'.

Wordplay

'I didn't think you'd like spelunking, but do you listen to me? Heck, no.'

"Puff! Pant! They don't have to do this in the Premier League!"

Eggs - You break it you buy it.

"A stalagmite, sure, but how'd you impale yourself on a stalactite?!"

Explorer finds something he didn't want to!

'Difference between 'ignorance' and 'apathy'? I don't know, and I don't care.'

"He's not very exciting in social situations but on the net he's a wildman."