Self-congratulator Gifts

'Miss Pym, we've made a smaller loss than last year, order me a much larger desk.'

"Oh, stop it. You are not at all obtuse." Complimentary angles make the other angles feel good about themselves.

That party went well.

Frog to other frog: 'Hey, nice pad.'

Self-esteem room

"I love you in a suit. You look so... employed."

"This next one's called 'Song for Me'."

"This might take awhile, Lord."

Complementary Beverages

'Why thankyou! ... and I've got one for you!'

Hyacinths

'It's my assistant - fishing for compliments.'

"By the way… If no one has mentioned this before, we think you're swell."

"Gracie, can you make me soar?"

Self esteem clinic - Go ahead, take a number. You deserve it.

A giraffe in a hat

"Not to blow my own horn, but the ad for my book in the 'Times' called it 'extraordinary'."

"Sure, you're an elephant, but you're not at all elephantine."

100% Bombast-Filled Parka

'Um, nice tie. Birthday present?'

Complimentary nuts: 'You may well be the most handsome, virile chap in the room tonight.'

'It was very good.'

"It's surprising, the number of men who would give their left arm to spend the night with me."

"Well, for starters I'd like to thank me."

'Ms. Collins, order me a dozen roses asap. And make sure I say something flattering to myself in the card.'

'Allow me to be the first to congratulate you on your sudden promotion.'

Compliment seeking missile

'Brilliant!'

"Who's gorgeous face is this I see? Is it a special person I'm going to spend the rest of my life with?"

Actually, calling me one-dimensional isn't much of an insult

Do I REALLY look like George Clooney... Now THAT'S what I call selling.

"I'll keep saying I plan to go to law school as long as I get nods of approval when introduced to my parents' friends."

"My monument to me is coming along nicely."

"My wife's in there having the 'full works'. For the past two hours I've been practising my reaction."

Some people can get by for a week on one compliment.