Seed Sleuth T-Shirts

'Pssst...hey, buddy, I got the good stuff for all your urban farming needs!'

"First Lady Lettuce goes missing, then Colonel Crouton followed by Reginald Radish... Great Caesar's Ghost! Someone is making a salad!"

I'm at the shrub with the empty bag of pretzels we sniffed last week. Where are you?

"Look, Professor - a stegosaurus!"

'Have you no common scents?!'

"Excuse me, Professor. I think I might have spotted a flaw in your theory!"

Roentgen tries to figure out what he's discovered.

"I need to self isolate. . . but I thought I'd better come in and see you first!"

'The dog ate my homework -- I thought maybe you could X-ray him.'

"I'm getting cinnamon, brandy, nutmeg, a hint of Alsatian."

"Do you smell something?"

'No, that's not my shaving lotion. We've been burning cow chips in the wood stove.'

"Perkins! What have you gone and done now...??"

The Huge-Underground Vat theory of why all wonton soup tastes exactly the same.

Medical Library - Large books with really revolting photographs

"Essentially Wilkins proves things and Brenner disproves them."

'Hey, it's that peeping Tom again, the one who has no respect for privacy.'

'It's for the girl who's in a hurry.'

GM Crops Genie.

Newton's Law and Order.

Undercover Biophysicists

"According to stomach content analysis he'll be dead in half an hour."

Galileo describes his discoveries to the church (and gets hit over the head by the bishop/pope with the telescope that he made the discoveries with).

The Animal Researcher Reports...'I've been watching this herd of cattle for seven years, and to be frank, I haven't seen them do anything yet!'

Schrodingers cat at the vets

'She didn't notice it was a wolf and not her grandma?? Had grandma never heard of electrolysis??'

'It's Yorick all right - I know his DNA well.'

'Trying to steal secrets again, Dr. Figowitz?'

'This is not Hungarian stew.' 'We ran out of Hungarians.'

"Light at the end of the tunnel!"

Genetically-Modified Foods: Are they safe?

"The search for a new painkiller has been a real headache."

'(Sniff!)... Hey! Somebody stole my identity!'

Professor Yomp is working overtime, trying to find a synthetic rhino horn.'

When you said you were going to find your ancestors I thought you meant on the INTERNET!