Security Official Gifts

'Don't blame me, how come you didn't notice the tide was out?'

"It is a violation of air national guard policy for you to possess an AK-47 from Iraq, boy!! Do you want to suffer the consequences of bringing back a souvenir?!!"

"Now, were those friends of your Gettys or Gottis?"

"I'm going to need a little more for the root cause than, who'da thunk."

'The fun begins when we go through airport security.'

"One more time, Mr Claus - who sold you the data?"

'You know too much,'

Airport Security.

'I guess it's not much consolation but I thought your impersonation of the King was a riot.'

"This is probably not the time to admit I only joined the force because I figured we'd just be chasing cat burglars."

'As it's your first day we're going to start you on something easy.'

"Jimmy, I want you to meet our new safety officer."

"OK, you're good and just the guy we need in security."

'I'm afraid that serves you right for not wearing your safety goggles!'

"Does anyone know anything about spyware?"

'You're right. Our old safety files have become a safety concern.'

TSA Noah

"It's not the first time he'd been warned about wearing a long tie when leaning over the shredder."

"He's a guard dog."

Dog barking at everything except a burglar.

"I see you've security marked your property."

Dogs stealing cat food - Vice Squad orders 'Stay!'

"You're either lying or not telling the truth."

'Nobody ever before had took much notice of Granny's homemade flour-sack bloomers.'

"I suppose you want the rest of the day off!"

The Scanner Of Love.

Privacy Conference Security

"Well the good news is that we did save a little money by not investing in cyber crime protection...."

OK! I promise that the questions will be easy!

"I spy with my little eye…"

Updated Stories. The Wicked Witch Of The West Tries A New Tactic To Get The Ruby Slippers. Security Checkpoint. Remove your shoes, please.

"So, Mr Canary, I see you have experience as a mine safety specialist..."

"Beware of Don"

Scarecrows guarding a field

"Ok, I found a secure line."