Security Jokesters Pillows

Help. Forgot All My Account Passwords.

Airport Security.

"I think you should hire me for my vast software knowledge. . . and then pay for me to go learn software."

'The problem seems to be in the memory bank.'

A fisherman reacts as he sees a drone flying over the lake with a fishing line into the water below.

"I forgot to turn on the alarm." "It's all right, Peedy is there."

"I don't think I can be truly happy unless I have more passwords."

Try again - Your password has to include barks, growls, whines and at least one yap.

How to create a password you can remember...

'Sir, we're receiving a signal from space. It might be a candidate for possible intelligent alien life!' 'Nice going you ninny, you butt-dialled Earth! Now they're going to know we exist!'

Munich Security Conference

"Do screen doors just keep insects out, or other things too?"

"Come on, dear...you can't blame everything on Russian hackers."

'Hello, security.'

The Screeeen!

"She barks once for drugs, twice for weapons, and ten times for candy bars."

Witch uses broom from broom share program.

'At the moment, it's only weakness is flypaper.' - (spyplane research dept.)

Airport security - next step?

'Yes, Fluffy was a great dog and to honor her memory, we've decided to keep her name as part of our computer password.'

Cloud computing.

'Did you Gack this suitcase yourself, sir?'

'When I said you will get an office with windows, I was referring to the operating system on the computer.'

'I can't tell you what I spent for reasons of national security.'

"Can you believe we walked right past security?"

"Sorry Brian, bit of a rush this morning - I've left my face in the car."

"Stand back? corrupt file."

Fabric Company: No tulle left in this vehicle overnight

"No, he's not a security risk ... he just loves the pat-downs."

Beware of the teddy

'I got a tool to remove malicious malware...'

America's Funniest Encrypted Passwords

"Beware of owner."

A-1 security from crime....

"The cash is down again. I'm beginning to suspect an inside job."