Security Joke Lover Pillows

'Oh no, we forgot to lock the safe!' 'What's the problem, we're both here aren't we?'

Airport Security.

"I'm not sure if we're named after passwords or vice versa."

"I don't think I can be truly happy unless I have more passwords."

Try again - Your password has to include barks, growls, whines and at least one yap.

How to create a password you can remember...

Munich Security Conference

"Do screen doors just keep insects out, or other things too?"

'Hello, security.'

'You have the right to refuse the body scanner, but then I'll have to pat you down.'

"She barks once for drugs, twice for weapons, and ten times for candy bars."

"This is a family operation, Ben, and we're evicting you from our family."

"So you are the data protection supervisor of the German government?"

"Can you believe we walked right past security?"

'I can't tell you what I spent for reasons of national security.'

'Those new airport scanners can see through clothes!'

'Did you Gack this suitcase yourself, sir?'

'Yes, Fluffy was a great dog and to honor her memory, we've decided to keep her name as part of our computer password.'

"Sorry Brian, bit of a rush this morning - I've left my face in the car."

Airport security - next step?

"I tell you, he's up to no good. He spends hours on the dark web."

Fabric Company: No tulle left in this vehicle overnight

"No, he's not a security risk ... he just loves the pat-downs."

Beware of the teddy

'I got a tool to remove malicious malware...'

"They say you should beware of attachments."

America's Funniest Encrypted Passwords

'If you see a stranger, you kill him -- it's called 'Homeland Security.''

"Beware of owner."

The continent you have requested cannot be found.

'Tower, we are ready for takeoff.'

"The cash is down again. I'm beginning to suspect an inside job."

Beware of the Dog - Leaping Over Fence

'Security.'

A-1 security from crime....