Security Aficionados Pillows

'Now we come to step 86 of how to enter your new computer logins.'

MRI Airport Security

Two dogs in yard with barbed wire whilst another dog scales a ladder.

"No wonder she couldn't get through the metal detector...she's got braces!"

'Where was the TSA?'

"Of course, if they ever start to suspect all their TVs are watching them back, we may have problems."

'You can all relax and resume your game. The unattended bag discovered on the infield turned out to be the second base.'

"Sorry kid, I work alone."

"I'm so glad we don't need a selfie stick."

"It says 'beware of robot dog.'"

CCTV in church.

The Ayatollah Bomb?

"Rest assured, anything you say in this office won't get repeated by me."

'This biometric ID badge is part of the new security system. The badge contains my encoded retinal scan, fingerprints, and level of job enthusiasm.'

'I can't shake off this feeling we're being watched.'

"If you're my gramma you wouldn't have a problem consenting to a retina scan!"

"Fifth robbery this week. That's not a security camera ??" a local TV news station installed it to save time."

'Don't worry -- the security camera is for your own protection.'

The prime minister: the current threat to national security...

"Hi, I'm the new IT-security-expert! Where is your server room? I want to see if I can overcome your firewall!"

'Someone is reading our emails. I'm afraid this means we're going to have to talk to each other.'

'Arnold, blow the whole depot, then hightail it out of here.'

'Principal McWit, a student without an appointment is here and says he's holding your computer access codes for ransom.'

'They take patient privacy so seriously around here they encrypt your name!'

'This fridge is fitted with CCTV.'

All items on the premises have been marked for identification: 'My cat sprayed everything in the house.'

'Halt! User name and password.'

ACL-To Hell With-U.

'You're right, good joke, bad timing...'

Beware of dog armed with cloaking device.

Every time I try to warn people about the threat level, they say, surely, you jest.

Beware of the dog.

Smile you're on camera! You're also on my podcast!

'Stop! That's no way to get data into the cloud.'