Second Chance Champion Pillows

'Your divorce was so mature, balanced, rational...you want to throw that all away with a reconciliation?'

What a success story! It says this guy was in prison and now owns a corporation! Ah, he went from pen to inc.

Fisherman Evolution: They have evolved over the years with three distinct species...the largest of these is the coarse fisherman.

Couple of Pikeys.

"I'm so happy to be back in the workforce I'll never complain out loud again about Mondays."

'No, I didn't get a presidential pardon, but I got something better. God has forgiven me.'

'It's my latest novel, 'Hard Times' part 2.'

Professor Ernie's history of philosophy. Rene Descartes had a difficult childhood. I think, therefore I am! I know you are, but what am I?!

'They were going to get married when they were young, but he kept forgetting the wedding date!'

"Mr. Caldwell comes to us from a minimum-security correctional facility in Pennsylvania."

"Brian, isn't Dry January and Veganuary enough?!!"

'Yes, I would like to go on a second honeymoon, provided it was with my second husband!'

Factory Rejects Inc.

'I want to thank all my obstacles for making this possible.'

"I'ma N.R.A. stalwart."

"You need a haircut and a shave."

"We rescued him form the research lab."

Animal Shelter. Adoptions. We love you already! Who is rescuing whom is a fair question here.

"This job involves travel? Let me call my parole officer and OK it with him."

"Phil is my Vice President in Charge of Snappy Comebacks."

Second marriage vows.

Died After A Brave Battle With Everything

'If I could live my life over, I'd need a really big loan.'

Bob walked away from the halfway house – but only got halfway.

"Oh, definitely, I feel there's a reason I was given a second chance."

Field of Broken Dreams

"My husband and I were divorced too young. It didn't last."

'But why on earth, Mr Dressen, would you want a twelfth opinion?'

"Rally around the flag, men - we're under attack again!!"

It was almost called 'Jerry Bens' until the famous eat-off of '78,

Dating club outside divorce court.

'Three letters of recommendation - do you have any from anyone other than your former wardens?'

'Just make sure you keep to the straight and narrow,old chap!'

REincarnation Assignments. Why do you want to be reincarnated? I always wanted a second chance to make a first impression!

Sunrise. Sunflop. Sunback.