Seasonal Slimmer Pillows

"Christmas - what a fuss eh?"

Toivola Jones and the Search For Spring.

'I swear, if he didn't always pick up the tab, I'd never go drinking with him.'

"Our fresh seasonal hand-crafted brews contain a full serving of spring vegetables."

"The rolling wheels...the ringing bells...signal the deliciousness of summer."

Hold those deer to you near to you this Christmas.

A Snowman checking out some products for blacken his teeth

Easter Egg Delivery

Anton's Bar and Grill

"Our seasonal special is spiced pumpkin apple butternut squash ale. Would you like that in a frosted mug or over ice cream?"

'Oh that's weird! i just had a shiver go down my wallet. My wife must have just bought something.'

"Me, I'm lazy, so I wouldn't seek an endless summer, but an endless winter. I so wish I could migrate to hibernate twice a year..."

"Because it's got a goddam crack in it, that's why."

Full fatHalf fatVirtually fat free.

'Any bargains going South?' (Bird asks travel agent).

"Are you sure you want to spend the winter here?"

STRIP "I've tried everywhere to get a new winter court...but all the stores are full of next years summer collections"

'You know that thin person inside you, struggling to get out? -- He seems to have gained weight, too.'

"...And don't forget to include the receipts!"

Unsuitable clothing.

'My holiday season: A rich tradition of belated giving and premature babbling.'

New for Fall

Car driving towards a sign that reads "You are now entering The Holidays - No exits"

Christmas Group Therapy.

December 24th and the December 26th.

The sounds of spring.

"Check out this app. It let's you substitute other vegetables for your nose."

'I'm sorry, we can't give you a surgically inserted gastric band, as it appears you already have two!'

Santa with shopping bags at the airport goes to the 'Frequent Flyers Check-In' desk.

"You can use Dave's cubicle. He has Seasonal Affective Disorder and won't be using it this winter. Whoa! I guess I'm wrong. There he is, hibernating under the desk!"

Reindeer in back of the plane wearing scarf that says 'Thanks for all the business'.

"It's sweet how their presences linger on after the season."