Sea Legend Lover Gifts

Old boatmen impressing children with made up stories about having been a smuggler

'I'm not sure what country he's representing, but he seems a real natural!'

Bite out of fishing pier.

'So Captain Ahab, I put it to you that you were deliberately stalking my client!'

'Stop complaining woman, you wanted a boating holiday!'

How can I enjoy that clean, fresh, salt air when I'm up to my neck in garbage?

'Oh, no - I have to read each tentacle - that'll be extra, of course.'

Olly really didn't know his arse from his elbow.

Pirate

Waiting for a turn to swim.

"You may enjoy swimming with the dolphins, Howard, but do they enjoy swimming with you?"

'You've changed since we got married.'

'Oh my! He finally proposed!'

'Make up your mind, pal - there are plenty of other fish who'd give their gills for this job.'

Whale Shark Thoughts...

'Oi! You threw that on Porpoise!'

'Clem,the doctor told you to get away and relax.'

'Alex - I didn't know you freckled.'

'But you're an admiral. How can you feel seasick on a waterbed?'

'Did you say psst?.'

Dog brings diver flippers.

'Research shows that while the number of surfers is somewhat constant over the year, there is a sudden increase in casual bathers over Summer...'

"Now you're just being a jerk!"

Shark food pyramid.

Older woman explains how to see off men with one of her looks

The Imperfect Storm

'This is definitely not your typical beaching.'

'…and I want you to limit yourself to 3 feeding frenzies a day.'

"So tell me, exactly when do you think the Greenland ice cap will start to melt?"

A crab finds an alternative to walking sideways.

'We have a tour every hour, on the hour, Sir...'

'I've told you time and again, if you didn't east so fast, you wouldn't swallow so much flotsam.'

"Holy Mackerel!"

Eel-mail

'Where are those nice blue fish that we like - the ones with the blue stripes?' - 'We ate them all - they're now extinct.'