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'Pencil for Cartoonists.'

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

“She’s in her abstract expressionism phase.”

Instructional guide to scribbling

'You could do that.' I did

"So, Sandra, what can you tell us about your lovely mood board?"

Bob woke up in a pile of notes, some scrawled so quickly that no one could decode them. He remembered nothing of the night before, except... yes, a fleeting glimpse of the writer's moon.

"Those are the failed attempts at my first novel."

"Your editor called again to see if the well was still dry."

"My favorite tea: hot daffodil-infused chamomile with a hint of whiskey. Are you serious? Of course I'm serious! I've been dosing myself with small quantities of poisonous daffodil ever since 1931. You have to build up an immunity if you want to survive in the cutthroat world of Scrabble tournaments."

'Is this any way to treat a budding genius?'

Writer: Humour and Tragedy.

'Don't write on that wall with crayons! It'll show up better on that wall over there.'

'To you it's wine, to me, it's my writer's block vaccine.'

"The trouble with spelling rules is that they impede creativity."

'I'm a writer.' - 'What a coincidence, I'm a reader.'

On the cusp of winning the Nobel, Bernie gets exposed by his third grade handwriting teacher.

"Where do you get your derivative ideas?"

'Two men having a sword fight with large pen and pencil.'

'Don't be hard on the boy, dear, I'm sure that Van Gogh's first sunflowers weren't so hot.'

Empty landscape containing food and stationery.

Outline; Introduction, Body, Conclusion.

"What? You asked me to draw you a bath."

'How God invented polish'

Museum Guard Portrait

Writer’s Corner

'I see a VERY important note from your doctor. Unfortunately, I can't read her handwriting.'

"He,he!. . . Some guy on the ninth hole is going crazy looking for this!"

'Of course this scribble doesn't make any sense. Why do you think the critics call it an intellectual masterpiece?'

Grey Squirrels Out Competing Red Squirrel for Food.

Squirrel Salon

"Would you like to squiggle here something that no-one in a MILLION years would be able to read!"

"It's the worst case of writer's block Sidney has ever had. He hasn't put a word on the page since fifth grade!"

'Yes! That's it! --- Only the handles were a lot longer.'