Science Experimenter Gifts

Mr, Gilford had a knack for making high school physics fun,

'I'm trying to turn gold into gasoline.'

'...then add some of the yellow powder to those blue crystals, heat it for a while, and see how you like it.'

'Tastes like cherry kool-aid, what's it do?'

'You're trying to reinvent yourself, aren't you?'

Another Cultured Meat Experiment Ends in Failure.

'Then we'll just mark it 'Do not shake well before using.''

Plasma scientist

"Sure we'll get in trouble, but our science grades will make up for it."

"I'm asking Papi for $30 to buy this science kit!"

Roland meets his new lab pardner.

Bunsen Burners for sale and bunsens for sale to go with them.

'So softmints react with more than just fizzy drinks!'

"Are you looking for metric or imperial sized neck bolts?"

'It's exploded! The wizard warned him to break it in gently.'

The Snap! Crackle! Pop! of burning ants.

Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, Esq.

Relax, you are now floating in hydrochloric acid...

The Soundness of Newton's Laws

"Young Frankenstein"

"Not only pharmaceuticals - we're also finding all sorts of industrial chemicals here."

'If he grabs the broccoli, we turn on the Raffi tunes. If he heads towards the Playstation, he hit him with the air horn at 100db.'

Jazz is Invented

"We tried 'Baby Mozart,' but he prefers 'Baby John Cage.'"

"Could you keep still?"

I'm looking forward tot he day we can afford some real statues for this place.

"What lead you to growing human tests in a test tube?"

'We call it the 'Tomato Surprise' because the chef tinkered with the DNA a little.'

"The instructions for the beer-making kit you gave me? Didn't need them -- I figured it out for myself. Drink up."

"Just a harmless little genetic experiment," they said. Yeah, right...

"My favorite tea: hot daffodil-infused chamomile with a hint of whiskey. Are you serious? Of course I'm serious! I've been dosing myself with small quantities of poisonous daffodil ever since 1931. You have to build up an immunity if you want to survive in the cutthroat world of Scrabble tournaments."

Miami Mice

"The trouble is, professor, you see the Erlenmeyer flask half empty and I see it half full."

Son, I don't think this was how Whistler painted HIS mother.

'...the side effects of this designer drug are more beneficial than it's intended use!'