Schoolyard Socialite Gifts

"This is my last day. My parents found a more expensive school on the East Side."

"May I have this arythmic flail?"

Harry Potter learns some 'new tricks' on his first day enrolled in a public school.

"Do you think that will count as our 'Fifteen minutes of fame'?"

"Recess does things to a man."

"We're going to the park to size up the competition."

Tuck Shop

LEMONADE, 'Actually, I hate places like this.'

'There is a kid at school who can play 'Jingle Bells' with his farts. That is impressive because flatulence is a difficult medium.'

"I didn't even know Smallville had a set!"

'Dr. Young is a professor at one of the nation's leading party schools.'

Health organizations doubt the benefits of skiing holidays.

"Hi Ginny, that's a nice new haircut you've got there. Are you trying to be cuter than me?"

"There's a notice from the co-op board. Would we be interested in playing softball on the Great Lawn?"

'Quick! Get me the dispute resolution mediator!'

'Actually, I hate places like this.'

'No, he's right. Cows have three udders. One for skim milk, one for two percent and the third one's for lactose free.'

'You realize, don't you, that you are playing fast and loose with my self esteem?'

High School Prom Expenses

'I would appreciate it if you don't call out in class.'

'I have kindergarten burnout!'

"Shall we go talk with those au pairs?"

'Oh great. The neighbors are worming their way into another BBQ.'

"Things have gotten bad here. There's talk of a war with another gated community."

'And this is Mario Batali. Of course, he's not the Mario Batali.'

'With Jesse Caldwell trasferring to another school, I've been promoted in the playground pecking order.'

Upon returning to school, none of the boys could help but notice how much Allison had developed over summer vacation.

"I think Wendy likes me... she chose me first for her cooperative learning group!"

'I've got to go, Mom - my playgroup called an emergency meeting,'

"What do you think our husbands talk about when they're down the pub?"

'Can Spot come out and play?'

'Pillow fight!'

'I love, love, love your mother's sense of humor.'

"I won't be donating my tech billions to this school."

"Who would've thought Ms. Eliot had so little sense of humor?"