Little Socialite Gifts

'I've got to go, Mom - my playgroup called an emergency meeting,'

'Actually, I hate places like this.'

Seniors Snooker Tournament.

"May I have this arythmic flail?"

#Whyneighborsdon'tknowtheirneighbors

'A Ball at the Mansion House'

"Another flue shot, Larry.

Children's Party

Why weren't we born rich instead of beautiful?

A little sharpener before dinner, darling?

"'Mr. Evans,' she said to me with that adorable smile, 'I think you're the nicest boy in the entire old-boy network.'"

'If you'll excuse me, I'm going to work the room.'

"Bob choked on a spoon of caviar while he was on skiing vacation in St. Moritz."

"Whoa! Wrong bar?"

LEMONADE, 'Actually, I hate places like this.'

Rod was unimpressed with the party - Sure, he was surrounded by bikini-clad lovelies, there was free champagne and a 20-foot jelly, but much to his chagrin, there was a distinct lack of cheese and pineapple chunks.

'You made a complete fool of yourself at the party last night...I just hope no one knows you were sober.'

A day at the races

"I didn't even know Smallville had a set!"

'Fill 'er up Fred!'

'Ah, beer! And the bringer of beer!'

"Brian's considering the optics."

'Everyone here likes a big band, right?'

"I think it’s time we started holding other kids’ hands."

'Can I get you anything? Coffee? A biscuit?...A lift home?'

Dog Teenagers

'Oh, we've met. We were once married to one another.'

"This is the Upper East Side, sir. We don’t sell ‘well’ vodka."

"I want you two to meet some people who just bought a fabulous five-story brownstone with a garden in Troy, New York."

"Either you're emitting the scent of power, or your phone battery is about to explode."

"Francophobe meet Francophile."

"What might you have written that I might say I've read?"

"Please try not to offer expert analysis."

'Can anybody here separate their fingers and if so will you pour?'

"Your party just totally blew us away."