School System Gifts

'The committee to study overcrowding in schools meets over there in the broom closet.'

"Is there any way I could get a dashboard instead of a report card?"

Teaching Then and Now

"I cheated a little in high school, the teachers cheated to raise the average grade, the principal cheated to improve the school's rating, and here I am."

'Sometimes I feel like I'm just a number at this school.'

"Compulsory education is a myth. We may be compelled to teach, but very few of them are compelled to learn."

"What is the battle cry for homeschoolers?" Kids: "Go Home!"

Ethics exam cheater.

Computer Room.

Kid at bus stop to kid: 'Needless to say, I cured my Mom of her home-schooling kick.'

'The creative process works best with a relaxed brain, so I'm letting my mind wander to let a solution drift in.'

I will study my speling words...

Weekday Morning Hell Bingo

'As a beginning teacher, you know you come here prepared to teach and become a good teacher. As you gain experience, you will learn that you also come here to care and become a great teacher.'

"There's something weird about Emily. She actually likes school!"

'I couldn't do my term paper because they've never made a movie about Rutherford B. Hayes.'

"It's no my fault I got a D. The system is broken."

'And this year's 'Inquisitive Learner Award' goes to...'

"Mom, please shake my chair. I'm taking a virtual school bus ride before class begins."

"Sign my yearbook?"

"I like going to school...and I like coming home from school. It's all the stuff in the middle that gives me trouble."

"What do you think I can get for it on the blackboard market?"

Boy and girl at thier studies

'The secret to doing a book report is only picking books that have been made in to movies.'

"I'll bet all of Albert Einstein's teachers felt like idiots for giving him bad grades too."

"There's really not much to obedience school. Just listen up and do what they say."

'I didn't do my homework because I forgot my user name and password.'

Happy kids running abount with a 'Schools out' banner

'The C minus was sufficient. I didn't need the advice against hiring a literary agent.'

'Good girl, Carol - now hands up all those who have lost their pens.'

'This has been a drill. Had this been an actual test you would have been instructed...'

"Could I ask just one question?"

School. Report Card. You couldn't name the presidents and flunked history? Yeah -- It's not what you know, it's who you know.

'I started out as a teacher's pet, and then it kind of snowballed.'

Harry Potter learns some 'new tricks' on his first day enrolled in a public school.