School Life Sage Gifts

The first day of school is always filled with crazy emotions. Joy and trauma. Triumph and failure. Frustration and disappointment. And that's just dealing with my cruddy new locker.

"It was just after we both became Junior School teachers that we decided not to have children of our own."

Ethics exam cheater.

I should be a writer when I grow up...

"I will not lick the principal, I will not lick the principal, I will not lick the principal, I will not lick the principal, I will not lick the principal."

"If a third grader knows the answer, how much of a problem can it really be?"

"Don't even interact with him. He just likes to say 'Kalamazoo.'"

A=Pi r 2, 'All this stuff about 'pie are square' makes me HUNGRY!'

"Sorry. I just find rotating my head helps me to relax during the test."

"Yeah, I got into trouble, but I think the principal really enjoyed my rendition of 'I Did It My Way.'"

"Have you been eating the paste again, Todd?"

"This was a wicked-hard test. I'm pretty sure everybody got a bad grade."

'Right, who threw that?' (giant pupil in class).

"In economics, I got an IOU."

'Wow! That's some growth spurt!'

"He said he doesn't want to see me in his office again..."

"By reading my note, you acknowledge having read and agreed to my Privacy Policy and Terms of Use."

Big Bang Theory.

Civics Class: Mock Election Today. Oh, no --- Another multiple choice test!

"Do you think that will count as our 'Fifteen minutes of fame'?"

"I'm sorry. I don't have yours. My dog ate your homework."

"If wisdom comes with age, what are we doing here at eight and a half?"

'The school. My counselor told me to make the most of it...'

'I'll give your note to my parents but our family policy is to never negotiate with terrorists.'

"The teacher expects too much of me. She wants me to give it the old college try, and I'm only in grade school."

"Right...you're all in detention until we find out who put the chameleon on the tartan rug!"

"I got all 'Cs', but I call that an 'A' report card...'A' for 'Average.'"

'Do you have any books on controlling little monsters?'

Caution May Contain Nuts.

"I'm the Class Clown fish."

"There are no croutons. I use tater tots on my salad."

"Being the smartest girl in third grade is going to Melinda's head."

"You said mindfulness could help us do well on the test, so I filled it up with as much as I could last night."

"Peach fuzz. How does a nectarine know when it reaches puberty?"

The Ekert Saga: 'Ah, another week of school begins...might as well try to make the most of it!...You're crampin' my style, Ekert.'