Classroom Sage Gifts

"For the next few hours, I'll be bringing you info with no tainment."

'As a beginning teacher, you know you come here prepared to teach and become a good teacher. As you gain experience, you will learn that you also come here to care and become a great teacher.'

'Okay, is there anybody else whose homework ate their dog?'

'Good girl, Carol - now hands up all those who have lost their pens.'

'What you seem to be suffering from is longevity.'

"If wisdom comes with age, what are we doing here at eight and a half?"

"William Blake said you can see the whole world in a grain of sand, but he doesn't always make a lot of sense."

Spiritualism: Meet the Authors.

"Maybe if I make myself inconspicuous I won't be called on."

"I got all 'Cs', but I call that an 'A' report card...'A' for 'Average.'"

Neuro, Biology, Chemistry, Feedback, Psychology, Technology, Physiology Institute

"You said mindfulness could help us do well on the test, so I filled it up with as much as I could last night."

'My class is so large and my seat so far back, I feel like I'm taking a distance-learning course.'

Don't you see, Kreutzer? That's why we have all this literature. So you won't duplicate an experiment that's already been done, and there's no reason at all why you should be duplicating Smedly's experiments. After all, he shares a lab with you.

A book reviewer reads between the margins.

"I've heard of being organized, but isn't this a little obsessive compulsive?"

'Life isn't fair and neither is Miss Brown!'

'My teacher said the school has tough new standards and I need to improve my vocabulary. What's 'vocabulary'?'

How to identify the alarming mood swings of male menopause.

One can hardly be expected to solve the riddle of existence without a computer

"Are you working on a vaccine for Covid-19?"

The History Teacher

"I've learned a lot in sixty-three years. But, unfortunately, almost all of it is about aluminum."

Psychiatrist interview an irrational number

'...All profits are local.'

Help me COVI one ten O.B. you're my only hope

Smirking or Non-smirking

"And then she said, 'You're wearing that to the psychiatrist?'"

"Do I look like a wise man to you?"

"Mom, no more apples for teacher. It looks like bribery."

Jules Henri Poincare

'Don't you hate undergoing peer review in these high school chemistry labs?'

Jeff's computer had ran out of memory again. Computer is saying 'How do I turn on again?'

'So then I thought, what's the idea job for a gentleman with my years of experience, wisdom and a desire to help others.'

"Rough year?" (2021 new year baby asking 2020 old year man)