Therapy Session Sage Gifts

"And then she said, 'You're wearing that to the psychiatrist?'"

'Anything you can compute I can compute better. I can compute anything better than you.'

We are shaped by what we love! Especially pizza and doughnuts!

"William Blake said you can see the whole world in a grain of sand, but he doesn't always make a lot of sense."

"Yeah, you could say I've got mother issues....she told me I have to move out!"

"Hello, my name is Karl and I'm addicted to speaking to small groups of strangers."

My therapist says I should take up basket making as a pastime!

"In my next album 'Gettin' Back', I refute all the strong beliefs expressed in 'Gettin' There', my previous album."

Music producers.

One can hardly be expected to solve the riddle of existence without a computer

"Did you honestly expect our couples therapist to know when Jacoby Ellsbury will be off the disabled list?!"

'I'll never forget you, Vince -- My therapist says it would be counterproductive to try.'

"I got my emotional baggage down to a little carry-on."

'I told you he had a temper.'

"Do you feel you were loved as a tadpole?"

"Adolescence can be a very trying time, Mr. Alcorn."

"We never talk about anything. 'Me Tarzan, you Jane. Me Tarzan, you Jane.' That's all he ever says."

"Do I look like a wise man to you?"

'I wouldn't worry about a poor sense of direction...'

'So, who's not a happy bunny?'

"Tell me..How do you feel about being abducted?"

Psychiatry. I know I've lost touch with reality, but in my defense, reality started it.

'Stop gritting your teeth!'

'The only reason she keeps me is to rub out her bed wrinkles.'

The chip - Loyal worker, tireless teacher, friend

'You seem pretty wound up today.'

"Rough year?" (2021 new year baby asking 2020 old year man)

'Well, John, in the past two years you've gone from being extremely depressed to being basically unhappy like the rest of us. My work here is done.'

"E-cigarette or non e-cigarette section."

"Your wife is here to shed some light on your version of the story."

The past only looks good when you're living in the present.

'Are you having a mid-life crisis?', 'Let's hope so.'

"I have a recurring dream that I have a recurring dream, but I can't remember what it is!"

As an experienced counsellor, she could see that their relationship had been doomed from the start.

'Wh-h-hatz-u-upp, dude?'