School Day Warrior Gifts

Computer Room.

"It's no my fault I got a D. The system is broken."

"The day at school? Oh, you know, the usual psychological and educational stew."

'What I did on my summer vacation: I wrote about what I had done the rest of the year.'

"Get up at 7; leave for school by 8; no video games until after homework is done -- how about some regulatory relief?"

"If something that doesn't kill me only makes me stronger, then I should be Atlas!"

"It's going to be one of those days."

The feeding frenzy has begun, gorging ourselves on bowl after bowl of college football.

Child finding school too hard.

'I'm playing 18 floors.'

'Sleep on your face again, Phil?'

"Damn! I keep waking up in the middle of the day."

'I won't bother to bath Mum, we're playing again tomorrow!'

"I'd like to see him try that on the leg press."

'Misery is sleeping in late on Saturday morning then realizing it's only Wednesday...'

Do not feed the clerks.

'Get out there, Holmes, and pile on!'

'You got him here before the tardy bell, Mrs. Bates, but I'm not sure he's prepared to learn.'

"Man! I haven't slept at all since school started!"

"These days, I'm mostly just legislating from the couch."

"Lunchward ho!"

'If I keep bringing diseases home from school, maybe I shouldn't go to school.'

"I hope your day is going bad."

"The meeting's over but it's so close to the end of the day. Let's just use our collective inertia and run out the clock."

A spider meal prepping

'Boy, am I hungry. Alll I've had to eat today is some homework!'

'Sleeping through Monday is the coward's way out!'

"My dad ate my homework."

'I'm not enjoying my childhood, I'm dealing with it.'

"Watch him. His body says Monday but his face says Friday."

'At 11:00 you'll be putting your right hand in. At 11:01 you'll take it out, put it back in and at 11:02, shake it all about...'

"Mrs. Martin is here. She's the new substitute teacher."