School Day Survivor Gifts

'What a day. I had a close encounter of the 3rd grade kind.'

'Hard day at school. The coffee maker in the teachers' lounge was broken.'

'I hate the first day of school.'

"It's going to be one of those days."

'Then I said, 'okay, Mom. I'll get up, but I won't get dressed for school'.'

"I'm exhausted from matching wits with my teacher all day."

'Turns out four score and seven years isn't the length of the school day.'

'Today we learned about math. I'm sure glad I'm all done with that!'

'Mother sent me back to school the minute I was feeling better.'

"The day at school? Oh, you know, the usual psychological and educational stew."

Computer Room.

'It says I missed freshmen Orientation and I have to take it in summer school in order to graduate.'

The full moon frenzy strikes again."

'Yes, grammar rules do evolve over time, but making up your own to 'stay ahead of the curve' won't work in this English class!'

Examinations.

"You said mindfulness could help us do well on the test, so I filled it up with as much as I could last night."

"There's an app that helped me finish grades 3 through 7. If you need me, I'll be in my room playing video games for the next few years."

'Will Mr. 'No Comment' please remain after class.'

Biology Revision - Arse / elbow.

"I enjoy the one day of the school year...that I didn't forget to do my homework."

"The first day of school. Yes sir. A day to make new friends. A day to mark new beginnings. A day to discover everyone but you has grown three feet over the summer."

"The school year is officially over, and the teachers won."

'Life isn't fair and neither is Miss Brown!'

"Get your lunchbox, you're going!"

'Want to hear something scary? This is the third time this week I've gotten off the bus and still remember what I've learned.'

'And it's not just me...Ms. Anthrope doesn't seem to like anyone.'

'Any child left longer than ten minutes past last bell will be given a free kitten.'

"And to finally break free from the crippling burden of my student loans."

"And what did my little darling do in school today?"

"So this is it...the first day of the new school year. I guess studying, tests and report cards are still the hot things around here."

'The good news is we were able to remove the homework from his stomach. The bad news is, your kid can't write worth a damn.'

"I think she marked yours in blue pen because she used up all her red on mine."

'Hmmm, everyone seems to have prepared for the exam except for Thomas who's making a long face now.'

'The only thing I'm sure of is death and taxes and home work.'

"Of course I love school...but I love no more cafeteria food more."