Scenic View Critic Gifts

Rating the Sunset

"Too crowded. Let's go."

"Geez, from way up here it almost looks like there’s hope for humanity."

Scenic Root: ants, bugs and worms using an exposed tree root as a scenic route.

An alleyway leads to a scenic area.

"Here's to East, West, South and Bridgehampton, and all the little Hamptons in between."

"Welcome to Randolph, Vermont. Don't even think of relocating here!"

I didn't realize our pitch had such a lovely view...

Sunset Attraction

Hotel Room

'What a view! The motivational poster doesn't do it justice.'

Entering Vermont, No Artificial Coloring

"When did movies start being dumb all year round?"

"I want to vacation where we can look at something scenic from some place climate-controlled."

Theater and the Sun

"He added the computer, TV and cable box. Apparently, sand wasn't enough."

'He left me five minutes after he got his new National Health glasses.'

Rudolph is at bar speaking to a patron-'So he asks me if I'll pull his sleigh and I'm like-'Not until I get that backpay you owe me fatso!' '

'So when do I get to see one of those scenic geysers you've been raving about?'

RV travelers see signs 'Viewpoint' and 'Opposing Viewpoint'.

'Sure, we host weddings, anniversaries and bar mitzvahs. On occasion, we even sell some wine.'

"Is there a section at the bottom for comments?"

'For sale'

"It's a bit overrated really isn't it?"

"Can you see that beautiful patch of color just to the left of Gulf Island Pond, with all those marvelous loons? That’s where we passed a sports bar."

Sunrise $5/Sunset $5

"Let's not have children."

"Did I mention the view?"

Beauty Spot for Middle Aged Men

'It's a shame it's such a clear day. When it's cloudy you can't see a thing from up here.'

"At last, a nice peaceful place to picnic."

"I’ve no clue if money can buy happiness. All I know is it bought this view."

'House for sale, lifestyle inlcuded.'

The Art Gallery