Scale Scrutineer Gifts

'See a doctor. Your cholesterol is twice your weight.'

Critisize your weight.

'Notice how with truth in packaging requirements all the labels begin with ‘OMG!''

"I don’t care that muscle weighs more than fat. I only know I work out here and gain 5 pounds!"

Nuclear Security Summit

CATCHY NAME

Woman is shocked at seeing her weight, she doesn't realise that her dog is also on the scales.

What your guitar says about you.

"I gained 10 pounds? I've brought my own bathroom scale for a second opinion."

Weight Gain Denial

'No, it's not water. You seem to be retaining food.'

Please seat to be weighted.

"I have to go on a diet! According to that fisherman I have gained fifty pounds overnight!!"

Woman and scales.

"I wouldn't have to go on a diet if we hadn't gone metric."

Woman and sport trainer

'Your weight second opinion.'

'Well, we couldn't store all the corn.'

Lady Justice using metric scales.

'...And when it registers over 140 pounds, it automatically triggers the refrigerator lock.'

'LIAR!'

"There must be an app for this..."

"Yes, you paid for the product and the plan, but there's an extra charge for actually using it."

Sitting down

"Government requires that we lower the bar."

'To make matter worse, our combined weight is higher than our credit score.'

'No matter what you do, you can't cheat a bathroom scale...'

'Hey, there's a spot - pull in there!'

'When did these start coming with privacy protection?'

'Wine and food doesn't go to waste in this hous, but it does go to waist.'

'You lie!'

Truth in Labeling: 'Snouts, lips, jowls, cheeks and viscera enclosed in intestine and served on a bun, Mustard optional.'

Lady getting her weight taken and machine exploding under pressure.

'I think it's having a core melt down!'

Lady getting her weight taken and machine exploding under pressure.