Savannah Satirist Pillows

"I'm the king of the jungle! Why do I always get the hand-me-down phones?"

A man peddles U.S. flags on the sidewalk, next to a man peddling copies of the U.S. constitution

Contrary to popular belief, the road to Hell is paved with a comprehensive, lifetime tax return.

Extinction of the dinosaurs fully explained

It turns out they don't go together so well,

Honest Vending

Superman flies Batman over a suburban neighborhood.

Sign: 'Welcome to Fernbanks. Beneath our quaint Norman Rockwell-ish exterior beats a big-box chain store heart, ready to sell out at the drop of a hat.'

'It's cheaper than gas.'

'Apologists today said little white lies -- but not the big lie -- may have played a part in Iraq Policies....'

"Good evening several times and welcome to QI. As usual I'll be asking a series of quite interesting questions and some comedians will be doing a lot of knob and fart gags. It's a winning formula!" "Don't knock it. No one likes knockers!" "Speak for yourself!" "Was that an entendre? I'll have a double." "Mine's a large one!"

Illogic Tree

"Elon Musk is buying rope and walnuts."

"Actually, I think it's a cluster of SCUD missiles heading our way!"

'Oh, come on - If you're gonna mess up my castle, take the whole thing.'

Johnson allows the Delta variant to run wild in Britain

"It's not carrots but the love of carrots that's the root of all evil."

Beware of the Lawn

"The Treasury is fairly sure that the figures in the budget are correct, they might just not be in the right order!"

The breakup

Donald Glover

Failure is no an option: "I'd now like to speak on the topic of government bailouts!"

Tarzan mobile phone

Let's tell the folks in the Garlic Belt there's no budget for steps 2 and 3.

'I suppose if we had some money we could buy sand from each other.'

'We need to change our marketing strategy.'

The Good Breathing Guide

"The militant hard-liners are making demands, the fanatical zealots are issuing threats, and the moderate centrists are offering suggestions."

Office of the PR of the United States

"Rumours of a crisis in the NHS are groundless...Spending is up by 2%, management ratios down by 62%..."

Suburban street.

'I might even change my views on genetics research if scientists could genetically engineer supreme court appointees!'

Ted Rall Hired by Pando. Thoughts?

'Marketing reports they're fooled all of the people all of the time.'

'Sales are up 12% since we moved Recovery over here to the hospital gift shop.'