Satirical Kings Gifts

'It's amazing what you can get on e-Bay these days.'

British savings accounts

Rich man vomiting euros to a beggar.

"And on the eighth day, God sat back with a scotch and soda and waited for the critical reviews."

"It isn't much of a dragon, but then, she wasn't much of a maiden."

Drive-thru Church

"It's time to get politics out of money."

Justice

"Can you hear me now?"

The 11th Commandment

Sermon - why our religion is really better than yours.

Manspreading in Art

Alexander Pope

Greek Tragedy: 'Yes... we agree to further cuts in government spendings..!!!'

God finger

Queen to daughter about puppy: 'You won't either name her 'Queenie'!'

"He took that kinda hard."

'You realize, we can't use the 'benign neglect' method for everything.'

CEO slumber

"Any family history of stroke? Diabetes? Bankruptcy?"

"You know the rules, if you can't pay my fee I shall have to eat you."

'Your honor, my client only broke into the museum because he had an art attack.'

No caption. (Rowers carry an oar in four briefcases).

'This is what we call a 'patient'...you MAY find some reference to one of them on page 435 of your manual.'

The King's New Robes.

China deploys troops to prepare for an American invasion of North Korea. Russia warns that if America attacks Syria again, Russia will respond with force. Y'know, last time we had a world war, we weren't the ones everyone was defending themselves against. Sometimes when you're playing tag, it's more fun to be "it." We should have out own political show.

Just what were you doing in Georgia anyways Hmmm Isn't it true that you were lookin' for a soul to steal Your confession states that you were in a bind cause you were way behind, Care to elaborate, Mr, Seacrest I mean, Lucifer,,

"All I'm saying is that you'd sell a lot more if you had Mary on the cover."

To err is human, to forgive is not company policy.

"I usually vote for whoever promises to cut the most tax."

"King of what, exactly?"

"Tell you what, Mark, when we write the gospels, better edit out that bit."

'Ever think that if you make another billion you'll be happy, and then you do, but you're not?'

'I always vote for the candidate I think will do the least damage.'

'You'll find the book 'Corporate Discipline In Three Easy Steps' in the fiction department.'