Satirical Fashionistas Gifts

"Do these puffy pants make me look less tyrannical?"

My Dad, trying to look young. The cap hides his bald spot and the sweatshirt hides his gut!

The mysterious Sherlock Holmes - 'Is he wearing his cap backwards or forwards?'

Emergency Hipster Beard

"Walking erect is very trendy now."

Mystery Solved - Boxers or Briefs, 'Thanks but you could have just told me.'

"They're not Levi Strauss - they're not Levi Tate."

The Dandy

"The one time in our lives when it's acceptable to run around naked, but they dress us up like L. L. Bean catalog."

All it takes is a little willpower and a good metabolism...

'Have you any W fronts?'

I'm sure it's fake.

'I hate waking up with coffin hair.'

"Damn. These must have shrunk in the wash." "I don't think so."

'I think my diet is finally working. went form a large to an extra medium.'

Flight Socks.

The Inventor of the Man Bun!

"Trust me, detainee orange is going to be huge this fall."

"I found an old photo of us, when we were punk rockers... Didn't we look ridiculous?"

Hoodies anticipate bride's choice of wedding dress.

On the catwalk it looked elegant and sexy! What happened?

Phone Mittens

"Gap... Tony Soprano fit"

"I don’t know, honey – sort of makes you look like a blockhead."

Cat scares away fish design on man's shirt.

"I thought I put on my 'big boy' pants this morning but apparently they were my 'fire me' pants."

"I'm thinking of waxing my back."

'Let's face it, we're not meant to wear hats...'

"Arr! This isn't the map to the treasure, it's the map to me winter sweaters."

"I'm looking for a tie that retracts a statement."

Ms. Bronte has a bad Eyre day.

Where Pleather Comes From

Hoody Woodpecker.

'My tux is at the cleaners.'

"Welcome aboard, Withers. Now just go see Personnel on seven, and Pants on twelve."