Satellite Savants Gifts

"Dear, you can't blame everything on the high price of cable..."

Felix Mendelssohn

Happy Surrogate Thanksgiving

Fred interpreted the word compact as a verb, not as an adjective.

'Who cares what she thinks? Grow a pair and buy the damn thing.'

Sir Edward Elgar

'You can laugh all you want, but since I bought this 'GPS' system, I haven't beached myself once!'

Antonin Leopold Dvorak

'You're new here, aren't you?'

TV Producers Workshop. The first goal of a series to avoid cancellation long enough to issue a DVD set. Get boxed before you get canned!

'If you're going to stare at that thing all day, at least watch something educational,,, like Japan,'

"We kiss a lot of frogs so that you find your prince."

'We like to make full use of the space.'

Anton Bruckner.

'Real? No. They're all made out of soy and tofu. We wanted to crack the meatless industry up a few notches.'

"Those are all my passwords."

"The dove certainly helped, but GPS really nailed it."

"Ned always naps more soundly when he's selling power back to the grid."

'No one is making fun of you. You're just being overly sensitive.'

There's the pay TV remote, the set top box remote, the TV remote...now where did I put the worth watching remote?

Benjamin Britten

"I'll be the superhero—you be the guy arguing about him online."

A house is full of signs directing where things are stored.

Sergei Prokofiev.

Jupid/Jupiter/Jupidest

'Now cover the other eye & read the same line.'

'He was offered a role in a sitcom and has the potential to be a successful child actor. We've already set up a legal defense fund.'

"These are my parents, the bingers. Mom binges on shows, and dad on food."

"How many times are young going to playback that last episode of 'Friends'?"

Ludwig van Beethoven

''Solar energy'? -- like I don't do enough for the little twerps already!'

Thug takes dog badger baiting with 'Set Nav'.

"Frankly, I think they've been completely obnoxious ever since they went solar."

"The doctor says you can go home. We'll get cable."

Benjamin Britten.