Sarcastic Sports Enthusiast Gifts

Follow England mate, they're always crap!

"Because you've been working so little, you can have the rest of your career here off."

"I admit saying England had no hope of winning the World Cup, me Lord, but it isn't treason."

Pet shop with recipes stand outside.

I think when they talk about 'taking more excercise' they meant more than lifting the remote control.

Finally, a big puffy hand for the losing team.

'Team spirit, my ass.'

...'So I said forget about the wages, I just want to play football.'

'On Tuesdays, I bowl.'

'We lost six nil!. . . and we were lucky to get the nil!'

'I used to be bipolar till I started supporting England.'

"My boss combines the impulsive joie de vivre of Ebenezer Scrooge with the empathy and comradeship of a tarantula. Less hair, though."

"You didn't tip the paper boy."

'Look here Frobisher, you've adhered to the rules. You haven't cheated, self-aggrandised or whined about money. That's rather unsportsmanlike of you.'

'You forgot one of the essential facts of putting - the ball always breaks toward the water.'

'The employees are angry because the company tennis courts are always busy!' 'LET THEM PLAY GOLF!'

Acting in Progress

"Dang, that place smelled like ass."

Will I ever meet a financial advisor who inerstands my needs and likes the same sports teams I do?

Thanks for giving me your '2

"Batter up..."

Tuesdays on ESPN! The iron man national mattress jousting games.

Fantasy Football League.

"I wouldn't come to watch this rubbish every week, If I wasn't their manager."

Grim Reaper's caddy hands him the correct scythe from a golf bag of different scythes

The Joe Whiskers' Workout

'I said 'Quick fill it up with sand!''

What I always say - don't be irreverent to God and mother nature!

Henge Football

Golfer putting into dead bear

'The only exercise I get with this is dusting it once a week.'

Nice bit of parking! If you don't mind not getting out of the car!

As you know, I dislike you immensely. Right back at you. However