Sanity Saver Pillows

Noise Pollution

"I'm going to miss it when they stop warning us"

"Me? I have a strong urge to devote my life to making the world a better place for all humanity."

Dentist's Office: 'I know that $3,280 hurt you more than it did me, Dad.'

'I got a big refund on my income tax.'

Global warming causes widespread flooding, but fortunately scientists were able to locate the giant plug on the ocean floor.

A collective sigh of relief.

'Remember, rising sea levels will raise all boats.'

Coastguard

"No, no, that won't be necessary-they're doing a pretty good job on themselves."

'Your tooth still sensitive to hot liquids my dear?'

'Oh - It's you.'

Jesus swept.

Coronavirus and Atlas

From trash to treasure

"Sorry, I'm only allowed to save humans, not refugees. Here in the EU we've got humanitarian values, you know?"

Protection for the world

"Behold! NOW is the accepted time to repent!"

"It's about time the price of generic drugs went down! Oh, and give me fifty quick picks."

Well at least we can handle these rocks.

Something's gotta give! But what will it be? Choose at least one thing to sorely neglect...

"Temperatures are rising."

Life's choices (Tampons and Chocolate).

'Me…me…catch me!'

'That's where he goes to regain his sanity.'

"The thing is - nobody loves me..."

'The good news is he won't survive to say 'I told you so'.'

The rich paying their way out of pollution.

"What I said was that we are committed to solving the problem... not to actually solving it!"

' How many times a year do you visit the dentist?' 'Twice, one for each tooth.'

'Must you get new clothes every season? I'm still wearing stuff I got years ago.'