Sanitation Specialist Gifts

Caution: Wet Floor

I'll have a gluten-free, hypoallergenic vegan cookie with whipped hand-sanitizer topping. Is your whipped hand-sanitizer organic? Totally. There's not a thing in it that can possibly hurt you. Can you BOIL the cookie just to be sure? That'll be extra.

Fair readers, please accept these personal tips for remaining healthy and germ free. Public service announcement! Keep your stress low. Exercise, eat right, hydrate and try to get a little affection in your life, if you get my meaning. If you use someone else's computer, wipe down the keyboard with alcohol to kill the germs. Ditto with the mouthpiece of a borrowed cellular phone. Don't touch anything or anyone. Bathe yourself in hand sanitizer. Don't leave the house, and if you do, don't inhale

Wendel maps his trip to the germaphobe society headquarters.

"You can have my disinfectant when you pry it from my cold, dead hands!"

Face Masks and Covid

Happy Holidays from Sanitary Claus!

...And he calls himself the 'Green' Giant...

Biofelineism

Man sees sign as he exits bathroom: 'Employees Often Wash Hands'.

Hand Sanitizer Man, beloved superhero of every workplace in the world.

Thank you, Essential Workers

Whack-a-molecule

Hand sanitizer

ABC Vice Company: Employees Must Squash Hands Before Returning to Work

Daisy Diaper Service

'Would you like me to wipe the cup with my finger or would you prefer Rover here licking it clean?'

'You're kidding... I've got a masters in philosophy too!'

"The mold cleaners are here! I gotta scram."

We're polishing our brand.

"You know, turning a hobby into a job kinda takes all the fun out of it."

Unpopular Street Signs: Go, Please Litter, Yes Parking, Garbage Collection - Sometimes Never - Mon-Fri.

Welsh water sewage

'Please take this away from me.'

Mask Autumn

"Why don't I start you off with the contact information of everyone who's read those menus over the last 14 days?"

'One day son, all this will be collected.'

"You have sewage between your teeth."

NYC Department of Sanitation

Typical...You don't see one for weeks then they all arrive together.'

"I could probably keep spring-cleaning till next winter."

Meals on Wheels/Wheelie Bins

"Don't ask where it comes from. Just be glad I can provide."

"Looks like you've got some competition."

'I know we got the job, but trust me, ‘dress for success' always applies, even after the interview.'