Sangria Sipper Gifts

"Sometimes Ted finds it difficult to leave the holiday spirit behind."

Guy at drink stand says to Medium: 'Medium?'

"Christmas - what a fuss eh?"

"Moments like this make me glad I taught you how to fetch mojitos."

'He's a superior breed - He always drinks thru' a straw!'

"Bad morning. I was running late and skipped my coffee, diet soda, energy drink and Ritalin."

'I swear, if he didn't always pick up the tab, I'd never go drinking with him.'

"Our fresh seasonal hand-crafted brews contain a full serving of spring vegetables."

Pasta

Bryan Ferry

"I forget to drink."

"...Stop complaining if it wasn't for the mosquitoes you wouldn't get any exercise at all!"

The last song before the party exploded.

Vending machines with junk food: 'Zing!', 'Zoom!' and 'Crash!'

"The Ususal, Mr. B?"

Beach flirting

'We're drinking to our round of golf...one shot at a time.'

Running Latte

'The good stuff is here, under the counter.'

"Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, fell, and retained a brilliant attorney."

A very fine vintage

Anton's Bar and Grill

'Gee, mom, you know I want to visit - I'm just so darned busy.'

'Just wait until I'm introduced to carbonated beverages!'

"Our seasonal special is spiced pumpkin apple butternut squash ale. Would you like that in a frosted mug or over ice cream?"

A Transformer for grownups

"Detox is two doors back, bro' - this is retox!"

The Stumble Inn Bar & Grill

"I'm a retriever but I prefer 'Go-Getter'."

Complaints Desk

'If you're into preparing healthy meals then I recommend the apricot brandy. It contains the antioxidant beta carotene.'

'I'm not as think as you drunk I am.'

'Come to order' 'I'll have a burger, hold the mayo, and a large cola.'

'Will you stop yelling save the whales and finish you pina colada?'

'Ah, 'man's best friend' and it's brought by a dog.'