Sales Trainer T-Shirts

'John this is where you should declare your undying love and tell Miriam she's the wind beneath your wings...'

"Very good. Now go out there and convince others."

Sales Course - "Remember, the secret of selling is 'sincerity' - once you can fake that you've got it made."

'When I said that Sales is all about the Art of Persuasion I didn't expect you to start shouting at customers, ‘Buy it or my family will be out on the street!''

"People like sincerity - learn to fake that and you've got it made."

"Mr. Colton, do we stand behind our products?"

'So, in closing, let's all say with as much sincerity as we can, 'Oh, what a darling kitchen!''

"Now the first thing you have to do is get a client's attention."

'Sales training. What are the first words you say if a woman answers the door?'

"Now the first thing you have to do is to get a client's attention."

"Do we want to buy a trampoline, Norman?"

Life with a professional baseball catcher.

"Why won't you teach us how to handle complaints?"

I'm going to practice on you before I start managing other people.

"Any questions?"

'Now THAT'S a presentation! Great delivery, great graphics, and he moonwalks from the room.'

"I'm not sure about this new trainee - he asked me when does he get to see the actual ropes."

How to deliver a successful presentation.

"Any questions?"

'One of the new targets is targeting which targets we're meant to target.'

'Which sounds better: 'now with MORE XZ100' or 'now with LESS XZ100'?'

"Good news...I found a doctor who says you can still play!"

"The anger management consultant said he wasn't going to alter his **** dates at this t****stage which fits in with the 'managing change' consultant who said it was to late to change her plans..."

Hanging off every word...

"I believe I can create a great presentation if I can only tap into my cognitive dissonance."

Quality Control

"Excuse me a moment, whilst I just change hats."

"Just go with the workflow."

"The GOOD news is that 94 people want to attend the leadership training, the bad news is that 64 of them want to change the venue, 56 the time and 45 want to be course leader."

"You may inflict pain, but it mustn't be severe or prolonged."

Targets.

'First of all, relax.'

'I hope that training aid doesn't give him the idea that bigger laptops could mean more output.'

"This is the communications workshop, right? Let’s get started, I’m prepared!"

'Let's go! Let's go! Hustle! ...Relatively speaking.'