Sales Tactics Enthusiast T-Shirts

'If this doesn't get them into the showroom, nothing will.' (customers following line of money.)

I was hoping you might convince him by demonstrating the quality of the product.

Pushy Salesmen

'What's the concept? I'm not sure what you're trying to say, Ms. Harris.'

"These are magic beans, my boy. Their value comes from growth and scale, not revenue."

'Hank here brings 10 years of top sales experience to our company so let's all try to make him feel welcome while he makes you all look bad...'

'Rabner is tops in customer retention.'

These Sales Reps get more aggressive every year.

The company's marketing strategy became increasingly sophisticated.

'Thanks to his brilliant conversation techniques, Bob had the shortest calls.'

'I appeared to start selling more when I stopped appearing to sell.'

"We're targeting a specific demographic: the utterly clueless."

'Our profit dropped because half of our salesmen are in 'How to increase the profit' - training, sir.'

'I lost my shoe, but I got my foot in the door.'

"As you can see, it's pretty simple - just find the customer and make him buy."

"Come climate change, you could find yourself sitting beach-front on the French riviera."

'No, I don't want to change my long distance phone company, and,,, Yes, I should have known it was you calling'

"Unfortunately, we lost the notes on this portion of our sales strategy."

'A telemarketing call for you, Sir.'

Marv's Preowned Vehicles...That new car smell can kill you! - Buy Used!

'CROOOAX! If we ever want to sell this damned parrot, we better not anybody what he has done to his previous owners... CROOOAX! If we ever want...'

"This cream puff was owned by a little old lady who only settled on Sundays."

'They say a fool and his money are soon parted. Here's a list of fools. Make it happen.'

'It worked. We expressed remorse, asked for forgiveness and sales are up sixty percent.'

"Yeah, but what's the hook?"

'Blast it's raining!'

I'm sorry - could you run that past me again?

"Actually, the 24/7 Roadside Assistance kinda makes up for the 24/7 vehicle depreciation."

"Could we talk Girl Scout cookies?"

'Our motto is, 'We'll do anything to sell a car!' but he really means it.'

"And when the extended warranty kicks in, we send you a big can of new car smell."

"The difference between a car salesman and a computer salesman is a car salesman knows when he's lying."

"No need to mention that the one owner was a driving school."

'And remember, no layaways, personal checks or terrorizing the villagers.'

Door to door salesman sees sign: 'We have everything.'