Sales Pioneer Gifts

The possibilities of outernet sales were limitless.

'I should not that the cherry and whipped cream were an afterthought created by our graphics dept.'

'I vote we hang the darn thing upside down and go home!'

"Now that I have everyone's attention..."

"Great! We're still going up! Chop a hole in the ceiling!"

"Jill Hamster's entrepreneurial disaster"

Olivia just hacked into the boy scouts' site and sold them 30,000 boxes of cookies.

'What do you do with the time you save?'

It would be a painful forty five minutes before Arthur finally admitted he left his presentation at home.

Signs: Sales, Profit and Media coverage.

"Bad things happen to people who don't buy my cookies, Sir."

'The definition of OBSOLETE: old fashioned dictionaries.'

The Salesman

'We're holding our own, but I'd really like to see some growth.'

"It's a 'Black eye friday'. I got it in a fight over a 56 inch TV."

"You're on top of this week's Sales Pyramid."

"Are you sure you want to present your ideas in the form of an airplane?"

"Al, you've been chosen Businessman of the Year by the Junior Chamber of Commerce."

"Here comes a client I must speak to. Excuse me while I slip into some jargon."

'Dog eat dog.'

Trade Show Sherpas

'Now this is my kind of green!'

'Herb will provide one of his concise interpretations of the quarterly sales charts.'

"Hey! Plants are on sale again! Woo-hoo!"

"Hire me and I'll bring in orders. Big orders. You're gonna need a bigger door."

"Mommy, watch, I'm living authentically!"

Real Estate Krisp Flakes: Location! Location! Location!

Sales.

"How's this for transparency: Our product isn't organic but our bullshit advertising it!"

'We have to go global since nobody around here will buy our product.'

"Ya, right. Who needs a web presence. I'll just compete in the global economy from here."

'Our most successful e-mail campaign was an offer to take customers off our e-mail list.'

'Please remember, it's not a lie if it turns a profit.'

'I understand this was the day you seized, Ferguson?'

'We raised the price, so at least as far as we're concerned it's new and improved.'