Sales Clerk T-Shirts

'What do you mean I have to buy both of them?! What kind of a business are you running?'

'These pajamas come with a flak jacket sewn into the lining to protect against the 'Stop Snoring' elbow in the ribs.'

'I'd like to return this shredder.'

'Now this gun can shoot ducks flying or sitting.'

'The old one fell apart.'

Shop assistant watches a woman trying many shoes in shoe shop.

"This plan gives you unlimited talk, hex and data."

"Your total is $10.97 and this is only $6."

"There's Mr. Dominguez. He thinks of us as family. So let's sell him as much as we can before we have a family feud."

"So, do you want balls that only go up, or ones that only go down?"

"Weren't you here last wash day?"

Hell for cashiers.

"Find it yourself!"

"Thank you for shopping and we hope you've had a great brand experience."

'Why on earth did you ask the customer if there was anything else you could do for him??!'

"I want to return this. I bought it a couple of years ago. It was on sale. I don't have the receipt. I trust we can handle this in a friendly, civilized way."

'I'm not sure what to do with you. You had a customer complaint this morning, then, a few minutes ago, you got a customer compliment...I guess they balance each other out.'

"This tie is too tight...!"

"…and if you want to spend less, there is this old model which still works just fine"

"Thanks for all your sales help. I like the outfit so much, I bought it online in the dressing room!"

"I want a refund on this computer. It's user hostile!"

"It must be the holidays. All of the fruitcakes are out."

"It pains me to inform you, Madam..."

"Hey, don't touch unless you plan to buy."

"We have every visible wavelength in stock. What color would you like to filter out?"

"I'll check, but you know what they say – if a story sounds too good to be true, it's probably sold out."

'And the quality of your merchandise has really gone downhill.'

A Lady Out Shopping.

'All uncomfortable chairs become antiques. The comfortable ones were worn out a long time ago.'

You can have these for nothing, they're the same ones you had on when you came in!

'No thanks, just looking.'

'The closing down sale didn't work, so we'll have to close down.'

Sales Clerk tricks woman into an instant merchandise exchange.

'Andy! That's my 4th grade teacher, Mrs. Werfel. You've got to wait on her for me. I'm too embarrassed.' - 'Is it because your a sales clerk or because you were late for class again yesterday.'

'Our clientele is middle class; you know, your average Joe-750ml.'