Saintly Humorist Gifts

'I'd buy her a drink, but I don't think I can do that up here.'

'No kidding? Are you really the patron saint of tax loopholes?'

How To Saint . . .

'Whe they said 'God is my Judge', I didn't realize He was a real attorney.'

"The water changes them back into babies. I think they call it the Fountain of Youth."

Two priests share a laugh outside a confessional booth

"Wait 'til my Dad hears about this!"

At the 2021 Religious Games

'I'm told you've been born again, again and again. . . ?'

St. Elmo's fired.

"Seriously, I used to be the staff of a guy named Moses, man the stories I could tell..."

Drive-thru Church

Guru.

Single Prayer Health Insurance

'Meaning of life? You bet! Here, pull my finger.'

Sunday 10 and 2: The Usual Superstitions.

R.C.I.A.

Praying Mantis.

Regifts of the Magi

OM, SWEET OM

"We're in deep trouble... there are some people quoting back to us what we taught them."

'Oh, the guru is up on the next peak -- I'm his agent.'

"...and thank you for sending my guardian angel to protect me from that truck today..."

Om and Ommer

Moses' TV guide.

"Look, don't 'Amen' me, and I won't 'Amen' you."

"We’re having privacy concerns with your omniscience."

Maybe I'd better write a thank you letter for the Last Supper after all

"Can you write 'To Mandy - you're the best'?"

"It's right here… Nov. 29th, 1981, at Elaine's… twelve percent."

'I'd like to attract them with dynamic preaching, but I'm not above luring them with sugar.'

"Yoga has helped me appreciate the healing power of donuts."

"Whoa! Now I remember. This was one of the possible side effects on the label."

God's Phone

'Before we begin, let's say a little prayer for humility.'