Saintly Humor Lover Gifts

'That's St Joseph. He's the patron saint of baby aspirin.'

St. Elmo's fired.

"That's our new church mascot."

"I'd have been here sooner if it hadn't been for early detection."

'Right now I'm counting the blessings that we owe to Uncle Sam.'

Norman Wisdom at the Pearly Gates

"Blessed are they who blow out birthday cakes candles, for they shall be de-lighted."

"It's right here… Nov. 29th, 1981, at Elaine's… twelve percent."

'Talking about Jesus is NOT name-dropping!'

"How does one experience the ultimate selfie? Swallow your cell phone."

'Before we begin, let's say a little prayer for humility.'

"T.G.I.F."

"In heaven there are no trees."

Pope Benedict at Easter

"Not sure that's the graven image of Baal we were looking for."

'No, I heard you snoring -- you just dreamed that you attained Nirvana.'

Submarine Sees Jesus Walking on Water

"I wonder if he's talking to me?"

Meditating cat. 'Hi! You have reached the 4th state of consciousness. We're not in right now...

Chicken nesting in a monk's head.

Saint Gustaf, patron of pranksters and practical jokers. Martyred by angry mob in 725.

'Every time one door closes, another one opens. Can you fix it?'

Church Spire

'If we do meet again in the after-life, you don't know me, o.k.?'

Priest

"Bad timing – he's in one of his Old testament moods today."

"I wasn't responsible for those sins."

"They hold up my halo!"

"Don't sit under the Bodhi Tree with anyone else but me."

'Now-Now! We all make mistakes.'

'Pig flu??!'

'Hey! You! Yes, You! I read in a yoga book that I, too, am God... So watch it!'

"I regret believing in reincarnation."

Commandments block.

'I was an overachiever.'