Sailing Fanatic Gifts

"We haven't left port yet you dozy old duffer!"

"Hi! I'm Greg Holbrook, born in L.A., now live in Stamford with my wife and three kids, went to school at Exeter, graduated Yale '38, did a two-year hitch in the Navy, now write copy for McCann-Erickson, my hobbies are tennis and sailing. Who are you and what do you do?"

'Call yourself a pirate? Where's the parrot and peg leg?'

'Looks like he's going to get your continental breakfast.'

Pirates

Seagiraffes

Cutaway view of Ocean liner.

"I think I've figured out why we can't find the marina."

Viking on beach with rubber ring shaped like viking ship.

Piracy on a boating lake

'Heavy seas tonight, Mom...'

"This cruise is getting a very stern review from me, I can tell you."

Captain steering house through flood.

'Looks like a good day fah haulin' lobstah, eh, Pauley?...Let's just say it became a good day fah drinkin'...'

"Entweder Fisch oder Fleisch"

Lighthouse Beam.

'That strange smell, George.. is FRESH AIR!'

'Just in case there is an accident.'

'...the storm raged and the doctor got drunk to steady his nerves..'

'Clem,the doctor told you to get away and relax.'

Ship upsidedown in a bottle has rescue boat in bottle next to it.

A Couple in A Speedboat.

It became increasingly difficult for the captain to reward his crew and still maintain his ferocious reputation.

'Of course I brought the emergency flares.'

'So, what do you want to talk about?'

'Well for crying out loud, why didn't you do that when I asked you?!!'

Rats deserting a sinking ship

Set sail

"Look lively crew, lest we be dashed upon these scrumptious shores."

"We seem to be going round in circles!"

Pirate captain: 'I'm so embarrassed! I walked around all day with my swash unbuckled!'

The Difficulties of Transporting Boats

On the plus side, I'd wager a lot of you folks back there had never seen an iceburg up close before.

Distractions.

'Honey, did you bring the anti-nausea pills?'