Safety Systems Analyst Gifts

Gas Pedal Sticking?

The Anti-Agent

The Computer Bore

Pool attached to child's bed.

"I've just been offered a job sorting out the Y1K bug.."

"I'm going to need a little more for the root cause than, who'da thunk."

"And you're certain these are accidents?"

'To most people, 1984 is just a novel; around here it's our instruction manual.'

Olivia just hacked into the boy scouts' site and sold them 30,000 boxes of cookies.

"Just give me your wallet. Trust me, you do not want to deal with my misplaced sense of entitlement."

Executive ignores wet floor warning and slides down hall

Health and Safety Gone Mad.

'Now that everyone's street is online, we're mapping interiors.'

Computer Expert

Computer monitor for a head.

"Gosh, I can't believe it's been over 25 years since our company was dragged, kicking and screaming, into the digital age!"

"On a positive note, he's not our boss. He's the guy who stole our boss's identity."

"Check the setting. I'm sure the CIA isn't hacking into our appliances just to burn your toast."

'It was going well - until his power suit short-circuited.'

"It's not just him. The whole system's down."

'From an aesthetic perspective, it has heart, beauty and intrigue, but is it a viable process design?'

Hardware and software

Fixing the Computer.

'Take us to your crash test facilities. We're here to liberate our compatriots!'

'Mind you don't wake the baby.'

"The crash-test rating on this puppy is off the charts!"

'Wouldn't it be cheaper to apologise to the Middle East?'

It appears to be some sort of computer virus.

"Good artists borrow, great artists steal."

"We'll get there when we get there!"

'I think what we need now is someone called a computer programmer.'

No caption (A crash test dummy in the shape of a bird flies toward a window. Other birds dressed as scientists study the experiment from the ground).

'Mum...Dad's barbecued his face again.'

A Little Extra

Time Out For Teddy