Safety Protocol Strategist Gifts

"Why don't I start you off with the contact information of everyone who's read those menus over the last 14 days?"

The new normal

'It's okay, there's a trampoline under the snow.'

"Well the good news is that we did save a little money by not investing in cyber crime protection...."

AI Safety Officer

European Union Health and Safety Direcorate rules

'Wait, wait, before you mix them, you have to say, 'Pow!'.'

'Remember, before entering, make sure you wipe your feet on the hazmat.'

Decontamination

"Hold it right there! Our legislature is currently considering new measures to protect children from the insidious ravages of cell phones in schools!"

'Who stuck corks on all the cursors?'

"The following is a test of the fire-alarm system. It is only a test. Please ignore the intense heat and combustion."

First Aid Box

"It doesn't look much like a 'witty painting' now, does it sir?"

The Atomium Bombs

'I told you you were missing a decimal point in you dynamite calculations.'

"At first I thought it was just coincidence, then I noticed it corresponded perfectly to your shift."

Break Glass in Case of Fire: Tiny Firemen.

"...And now step 2 disconnect power before plugging in..."

Snowman has cage protecting his nose.

Hazardous substance - ignitable, corrosive, reactive, toxic, real smelly, yucchy.

"Your new phone comes with this fire extinguisher. And we already added the number to the fire dept. to your contacts."

'Apparently, he leaned over to read a 'safety notice' and fell out of the window.'

Moses does a Life jacket demo

"For extra protection, this one is armed with a tiny gun of its own."

'Mom's in the bedroom trying on scenarios.'

"Eating the mistakes is a tough job, but somebody has to do it."

The Muscle in Brussels

A sign at a nuclear power plant - 'In case of emergency run!'

"He wasn't specific. His last message just said, play it safe - whatever that means."

'So, Bill! What do you think my chances are of moving into supervisory position?'

"My mistake. It was the mailman."

Staff Only

'I'll take this one.'

Acme Candles - In case of fire, break glass.