Safety-first Gym-goer Gifts

5. Install all equipment carefully. 6. Never increase the weight load of any exercise machine when you are by yourself.

"You think you can? Think again, mister. You know you can. Got that?"

"I'm off to the gym, where my private self and my public self converge."

"This feels like an accomplishment."

'Well, well, well. It wasn't a 12 lb baby after all. It was a six pound one pumping iron.'

"If we carry them home we’ll get at least one workout."

'I guess my brain just started to really care about itself.'

'You know you're getting old when you take longer to recover than to get tired.'

Bodybuilder pumping himself up.

Bench Press Accident

"Empty again? What's going on around here anyway?"

"We're exclusively delts."

'I'm afraid that serves you right for not wearing your safety goggles!'

"Did you bring any protection with you?"

Sam's Gym. My problem is I can't get the body I want with the body I've got!

Exercising

"And then on ab day they roll on their backs, flail, and mimic us in the throes of death."

'We're looking for athletic people.'

"He's a dedicated lifter, but he always skips leg day."

Carrot in front of the donkey workout.

Zeus injects himself with steroids before throwing lightning bolts

Like lambs to the slaughter, my ass.

"I appreciate the support. It feels good to finally get that off my chest."

"You'll have to forgive Roland. He still uses 'stomach' and 'abdominals' interchangeably."

'Mum...Dad's barbecued his face again.'

Reasonableman

Tired executive going into gym coming out gleaming

"My wife says she wants you to make me fit for purpose."

Exercise Bars

No caption (A man running on a treadmill hands a relay baton to a man on the treadmill in front of him).

'Hey, Bob, can you get this itch on my chin? It's driving me nuts.'

'Bigley, you're over-training!'

TV chef sets the TV on fire.

"Feeling stupid yet? No? Then keep going!"

'It's called exercising. It's like playing. . . only without the fun part.'